Title: 'A Night of Grief and Laughter: Remembering John Perry Barlow's Unforgettable Bond with JFK Jr.

Article:

As I sat in my small studio apartment, the TV series Love Story brought back a flood of memories from 1994. It was a strange week that began with devastating news: Cynthia Horner, a psychiatrist and friend, had passed away suddenly on a plane at just shy of her 30th birthday. My wife called me with the shocking news, and I rushed to John Perry Barlow’s place, where we spent the next six hours crying, drinking, and headbanging together. Our friend, John F. Kennedy Jr., was also there, offering support in the wake of this inexplicable tragedy.

Barlow, who passed away in 2018 at age 70, was a larger-than-life figure known for his many talents: he was the self-described junior lyricist of the Grateful Dead, a proselytizer of the Internet, cofounder of the Electronic Frontier Foundation, and a networker extraordinaire. He was also close friends with JFK Jr., an unlikely pairing that said something about both parties.

Their connection began in 1977 when Jackie Kennedy called Barlow at the suggestion of a mutual friend to introduce him to her 17-year-old son, JFK Jr. Barlow wrote about their summer together on his family ranch in Wyoming, where they got high and dropped explosives down gas wells. Over the years, Barlow moved from being a reprobate father figure to more of a friend.

The bond between Barlow and JFK Jr. was lifelong. In 1993, they attended a Prince concert together, tripping and dancing with the crowd at Radio City Music Hall. Later, after Barlow met Cynthia, the two would double-date with JFK Jr. and his then-girlfriend, Daryl Hannah. After Cynthia’s passing, Hannah helped plan a memorial service.

In 1994, JFK Jr. moved on from Hannah and wooed Carolyn Bessette. Barlow became a confidant of his friend’s new sweetheart, even participating in the ceremony at their intimate wedding in 1996. One picture shows Barlow preparing for the formalities with JFK Jr., Ted Kennedy, and the priest.

In his autobiography, Mother American Night, Barlow provides an alternate explanation for why JFK Jr.’s Cessna took off at sunset, resulting in a night flight that culminated in his death, along with the deaths of his wife and her sister. According to Barlow, he had just sent his 2,500 closest friends the news that his mother had died, and Kennedy was late to the airport because he was composing a long condolence email.

I have one more anecdote to share about my brief exposure to the Barlow-Kennedy friendship. It involves a bizarre moment from the night when Barlow lost Cynthia. Some time into our impromptu shiva, my wife called Barlow’s apartment, and JFK Jr. picked up the phone. My wife expressed her condolences, but Kennedy corrected her, saying, “It’s John Kennedy.” He handed the phone to Barlow, who was sitting on the floor at his feet. When Barlow took the phone, my wife asked, “John, how are you?” Barlow snorted and replied, “Well aside from that, Mrs. Kennedy, how did you like Dallas?”

Barlow was referencing an old joke, a variation on one involving Mrs. Lincoln and the play she attended with her husband in 1865. But it’s likely no one had ever made that crack in front of the assassinated president’s son. JFK Jr. looked stunned, but Barlow quickly apologized and hugged his legs. I could feel Kennedy’s brain processing a mulligan: Hey, the guy just lost his girlfriend. The moment passed.

As I reflect on this strange week, I’m reminded of the power of friendship in times of grief. Despite the tragedy, Barlow, JFK Jr., and I found ways to laugh and bond over our shared loss. It’s a memory that has stayed with me all these years, a testament to the enduring bonds forged between people from different walks of life.

Analysis based on: https://www.wired.com/story/jfk-jr-john-perry-barlow-friendship-love-story/